I took a lazy day. Even though my whole life has been pretty much lazy. But today it just felt right. I did however clean up the endless amounts of toys that I am forced to deal with, having a kid. Will it ever end?
I am struggling in life, with the positive new way to live. I am still angry, hurt and bitter. Not at great combination, giving im unemployed, bored almost all the time. It gives me a lot of things to think about, stress about, make up in my mind.
However through my blogs I have an outlet, so to say. Just a place to be anyone other than what I am, right now.
I am working on FGH. Forgiveness, Gratitude and hope. I am staying somewhat positive, oh but those negative feelings are almost always present. I just have to take a step back mentally and remind myself. Im at the bottom of the barrel of life, and there's only up to go.
And trust me, Im going up. UP.
I can say I will get my finances going, savings will get started again, I will get a better car and living arrangements. And when the time is better, we will move back to California and Jorja will have time with her father.
This I will do.
until tomorrow.
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