To feel the sun again.  To have hope, to have my little plans I would write down on a to-do list. To be able to look at Jorja and not feel tremendous amount of guilt that I have. To make plans with friends and be excited.  To not have to run my finances over and over again to be sure I have enough to buy something special.  To be able to remember the good instead of this stabbing, burning pain. To be able to just let go of the hurt.and you hurt me beyond the point, that you hate the right to. To go a day without thinking how great jorjas life would be if I just walked away from her. To stop letting you destroy all the the happiness our daughter gives me. To be able to relax and not feel like every knock on the door will be someone to take Jorja away. To be able to put what's left of myself together and heal. To understand Yuri that you did all you denied because of yourself not me. To stop regretting telling you about Jorja in the first. To not always feel im failing Jorja simply because you claim I am. To allow to be love, love myself and find that place in the sun.

I will feel the sun again.
I will love myself and respect myself because I deserve it.
I will let go of your disappoints and know it's you who choose to that.
I will become myself but better.

Because I believe that when someone has hurt you as much as he continues to mess with me. There is always a time for revenge.  But as in everything in life even revenge runs its course

Tomorrow I'll be better.

Tomorrow I will feel the sun with so much appreciation.  Living in my little world of darkness h