the new and improved MISSWORLD 2.0 the blog.

" When you take revenge on somebody, you are actually paying them the highest compliment possible. It's like saying, "You've affected my life to such an extent that I must reciprocate. I must affect your life as deeply as you have mine". Revenge may be the ultimate Hallmark card. Yeah. When you think of it like that, the cliché is true. Revenge is sweet." Augustus Hill-OZ

I haven't updated this blog, because I had planned on moving to another blogging site. However that site sucked so I decided to bring it back here. Besides these blogs that I have written here are really me. The pain and disappointment I felt at that time. I avoided it because it was such a open wound to me, to my soul that it was better to not be reminded of it daily.

Recently I had re-watched the HBO show OZ. I was bored and taking advantage of my free membership to AmzonPrime Instant Video. So the complete week that I was sick no thanks to the public school systems, I chose to watch this. Gotta tell you, even though most of the characters on the show was sociopaths some of their stories was touching and I did find myself rooting for the bad guys. The character Augustus Hill did the voice overs from season 1 to the last season 7. The theme of one show was revenge and Hill's quote about revenge being the highest compliment was true to me. 

I mean look at it this way. I for a while had looked to bring revenge on the *douchebag* who I felt fucked my life over. I just had to tell all those people, those tools, who proclaim he's so great, what a drug dealing deadbeat, cheating, lying deadbeat he really is. I need vindication I needed them to see what the truth was about him.

Why??

I honestly don't know why I had the need of shaming him. If his friends wanted to be blinded and "drink the Jacob juice" who cares, they don't mean anything to me. I guess I could say shaming him, embarrassed him a little.

Throughout the summer I started college, which I love and I have a 3.67 GPA. I found a new way to deal with my ADHD and anxiety. I found the time to work on myself.

I stopped seeking revenge. I stopped letting the asshole, who hasn't ever been good for me or to me,have the control. He was making me miserable, which in turn made me happy...I think.

Now I leave you with this,  I agree revenge is the ultimate compliment to someone but what is forgiveness to the same person who fucked you over? Forgiving someone perhaps could be you saying to them "hey asshole, yeah I know what you've done, but you will never know how upsetting it really is and how it affect me, so fucking fuck off, I forgive you" I